Suicidal thoughts
by Alpha Andrew
Summary: Well I don't really know how to describe it just give it a chance this is a one shot


**A/N Hey guys Now from the title alone I can tell I've worried some people... All I can think to say is read the story and thanks to crowwolf for Robert, country wolf dog for CJ, AaOWaSaCD4ever for Cole and Tori and I think that's it Alright go on and read guys**

(Humphrey's POV)

As I walk around the eternities I see a mix of emotions, some wolves now feel bad some wolves just trying to keep on with their normal lives and then others who just seem to be unaffected by the tragedy. Even though those wolves are not showing their emotions I know they at least feel something for the death of Andrew just based on the fact that he was a great guy. As I think I keep walking heading toward my den and when I get there I go to sleep for a while so I can think.

(Humphrey's POV 5 hours later)

As I wake up I feel groggy and disoriented but I shake it off and I get up, stretch and walk outside to see the sun is still somewhat near the middle of the sky so I smile knowing I haven't wasted the entire day but my smile disappears when I remember why I was so sad earlier I hang my head and then decide to go find Kate and see if she's doing anything, she may need help with.

As I walk around I see some alphas moving around the territory which makes me wonder what Kate and Garth are planning, as I get to Garth and Lilly's den I see Kate in there as well as the others so I walk in and sit down. As I sit down Kate comes over, nuzzles me and says.

"Are you ok Humphrey?" she says concerned, I sigh and respond.

"I don't know Kate at this point I really don't." she nods and we begin talking about the plan to attack the other pack after an hour or two we are finished and me and Cole are talking by the stream.

"Are you sure you're ok Cole?" he looks up from the water and says,

"I think so but I'm not entirely sure what about you?"

"I don't know it just kind of seems pointless to me that if we have to deal with death on a regular basis what's the point of living and can that even be called life?" I ask looking at him and his expression turns a little more concerned.

"Humphrey what are you thinking?"

"I...I don't know...I think I'm just going to…Walk around for a bit." I say and I get up and start to walk around the territory but what I can barely hear from Cole is him saying,

"Don't do anything stupid, your all I have left besides Tori." but at this point I'm just too confused and emotion filled to process it now and I continue walking around until I walked pretty much the entire territory but one part that's was saving for last an extremely large mountain that overlooks the territory. As I walk there I pass a few people but I stop to talk to one group in particular.

"Hey Humphrey." I turn and look to see Robert, CJ, and Daryl talking in a group and Robert waving to me, I walk over to them and start talking with them.

"Hey guys what's up?" I ask with a bit of gloom in my voice,

"Hey man we heard about your brother we are deeply sorry." says Daryl with CJ and Robert nodding in agreement

"Thanks guys it really means a lot." I reply Robert smiles at me and says,

"It's what we are here for man, so what are you doing?"

"Oh I'm just going to climb the mountain over there." I say pointing past them to the mountain. Robert gulps and says

"Are you sure that's a good idea man?" I look at him and say,

"Yeah I think so, I don't really see a point anymore life is just death, monotony and suffering, what's the point of living?"

"While I see your point you can't do that to your people, they need you more than you think." says Daryl and for some reason it makes me extremely angry and I respond.

"Ok you know what! They don't need me! I am a weak useless omega! They need a strong alpha like you three or Garth or Andrew!" as soon as I finish I turn and start to run up the mountain and after a few seconds I look behind me to see them gone so I keep going and after a few minutes of running I am at the top of the mountain on a ledge and I think about why I am doing this and who I'm influencing by doing it.

"Well there's Cole and Kate and Garth and Lilly and well...Everyone." I say to myself in a low voice I keep thinking when I hear a voice say,

"Humphrey..." I look around to see nothing but when I look in front of me I see a ghostly figure of a wolf, when I concentrate on it I see it is Andrew!

"Andrew! You're alive! Wait... No you're not! This is just my head playing tricks!" I say going from happy to angry,

"No Humphrey it's me and you can't do it your life is worth too much for you to waste it." he says and I look at him and say.

"But it's so hard to go on like this!" with all my anguish in my voice,

"I know but you have to keep going for me, for Cole, for Tori... For everybody." he says coming closer

"Ok... Your right I'll try... How long can you stay?" I ask him looking to him with sad eyes.

"Not much longer, but I will give you this." he says and he comes closer to me and I feel something around my neck and I look down to see a chain like Andrews but it has a cross on it with the names Andrew Cole and Humphrey on it,

"Always remember me Humphrey and give this to Cole and this to Abby." he says putting another one the same as mine and one that is a heart beside my paw and then he disappears in the wind saying one last thing.

"Never give up Humphrey... I love you." I look up to the moon and say

"Ok Andrew, I won't give up, and instead of just mourning your death I'm going to celebrate your life." I say that and I look around to see Kate, garth, Lilly, Cole, Tori, CJ, Robert, Daryl and a few others coming up the path I turn to them with a smile on my and I hear Kate shout.

"Humphrey don't do it!" I run to them and hug her and say.

"It's ok, I won't ever leave you." they all looks at me confused and I say

"I saw Andrew he told me never to give up, to always remember him and to take care of all of you also to give you this Cole." I say putting his necklace on him

"And this to you Abby." I say putting hers around her neck and as she sees it she starts crying and when I put it on she hugs me.

"So Humphrey, are you good?" asks Robert still a little concerned.

"Yeah I'm good let's go." I say and we all walk back to the pack to continue our lives... And avenge Andrew.

**A/N now before any of you question my mental state I am ok guys! My friend died yesterday and another one of My friends died two years ago. I was very depressed earlier today and I wrote this but thanks to the help of my ffiends-crowwolf, Humphrey loves Kate, country wolf dog, omegawolf12, alpha's soul, dinoj62, apex wolf, deaths shadow 2016 and a few others if I forgot to put your name sorry but there's too many to name and to those of you who I named who are like I didn't do anything yes you did you did many thing you just don't know it. I think that's it bye guys. PS if you want to know what I'm feeling right now YouTube the songs eminem- dudey and eminem- your never over the first one is how I felt at the beginning of writing this and the second is how I feel now **


End file.
